Things Our Tired Brains Do That Sabotage Success

I actually have a really fabulous appreciation for my brain, but that hasn’t always been the case. In fact, once upon a time I actually underestimated just how great my brain operated, and really took it for granted.  

That all changed a few years ago. Back then I was on medication that had me feeling like I was constantly in a fog. This brain that was once really quick, and sometimes witty was struggling to focus on the simplest of things. Thoughts were forgotten almost as soon as they came into my mind, and trying to think through even small tasks, like doing my laundry became challenging. It was so bad some days that on one occasion I actually forgot my own name when introducing myself at a networking event. 

Thankfully that brain fog and medical condition are far behind me now, but I am grateful for that experience. Because of that part of my journey through this life, I have a lot more love and appreciation for my brain and I don’t take it for granted. 

I am also a lot more protective of my brain now, and when it is tired and needs a break I am a lot more willing to take one. Sure I can push through the fatigue when I really need to, but I have learned that I usually don’t need to push through. 

Those pressing and urgent tasks that I believe absolutely cannot wait, actually almost always can wait. They are going to be there in 20 minutes… or tomorrow… or next week. And while it’s good to get things checked off our list and stay on top of what needs to be done, we can’t do that nearly as well when we are tired and need a break. 

Our brains are also really good at telling us when we need that break… even though we have gotten good at ignoring the cues.

Like me you’ve probably been taught to ignore the signs, and keep on pushing through. As a recovering workaholic I know I was brilliant at ignoring the warning signs my brain was sending out, and I had to teach myself to listen to them again. After today’s episode I hope you are much better at listening as well. 

Here are the signs you’ll want to look for. 

Pushing through just one more task… 

This is almost always the first sign for me… the need to do just one more thing before I end my day. Now sometimes, I actually do need to do one more thing and the need to do it has nothing to do with being tired. Here is how I know when I am doing this out of fatigue and not just getting things done… 

• I have difficulty getting it done. I keep losing my train of thought or can’t seem to concentrate on the task at hand. When I can’t concentrate, everything I do is so much more challenging.
• There is an underlying sense of overwhelm, and even the smallest of tasks feel like a huge undertaking.
• I realize my brows are furrowed, or what my hubby calls my vulture look. You know when your eyebrows are drawn together and you’re squinting for no apparent reason. 

These are the most common signs for me, but there are other signs that my desire to do “one more thing” is coming from a place of mental fatigue. Like a craving for something crunchy and salty, or tension in my shoulders. When I feel any of these I know it’s mental fatigue and something needs to shift.  

What I do when the “one more thing” syndrome has taken over…  

I set a timer for 10 minutes and step away, and try to do something that involves movement, like putting away my laundry, picking up the house. Maybe just taking a walk around our property when the weather is nice. 

After 10 minutes I know if a break was enough to recharge me, or if I just need to be done for the day. Either way I feel better and my brain is much happier. 

Avoidance and Procrastination kick in… 

On the flip side of pushing through and doing one more thing is avoidance and procrastination. I can procrastinate with the best of you, and sometimes I admit there is a good reason to pause before taking action. Like when I am thinking about making a big change in my life or business.

Pausing gives me time to play around with the idea and see if it is really a good fit for me. Procrastination is all about avoidance.  When my brain needs a break it will 

• Avoid taking care of things that really need to be done. Like updating my expense report.
• Replace high priority tasks, like updating my expense report, with low priority tasks like tweaking my marketing that is already done and working well
• Dive head first into busy work and spend way too much time doing things that does little to nothing to support my business, all while convincing myself that it is important 

Complaining about our clients (or anyone for that matter!)

We all have “those” people who trigger us, and clients can certainly be the ones we complain about. Thankfully as time goes on we begin to recognize when someone isn’t a good fit, so that the desire to complain is greatly diminished. I know I have gotten really good at attracting my dream clients, and I can say with absolute certainty that I absolutely love the clients I have right now. I also am very intentional about who I allow into my inner circle, as I only want people that make my life better, close to me. 

Which means, when I find myself complaining about a client or any one else for that matter I know I am tired. I can spot this pattern when I find myself…

• Getting irritated at something simple, like having a client ask a question. My happy brain welcomes questions and recognizes my clients don’t know all the ins and outs of branding and website design like I do. My tired brain isn’t so nice.
• Reading more into their emails than what is really there. This could be interpreting a simple change request as a complaint against everything I do or assuming they’re questioning my expertise when they’re really just asking for clarity.
• Comparing one client to another, forgetting that they are entirely different people with different needs. This is my tired brain at work

What I do when I find myself complaining… 

There are two things I do when I find myself complaining. The first one is I take a nap. This is usually a quick 15 minute cat nap and sometimes I just close my eyes and focus on relaxing instead of actually sleeping. Sometimes I crash for a few hours. I let my body and my mind decide what I need, and just lean into that. The key is to straight up rest and do nothing else. 

The second thing I do, especially if the nap doesn't work, is journal. As I was sharing with a client the other day, my journal is where all of my negative thoughts get a voice, and I have learned that the quicker I get them out, the quicker I can let them go for good. 

Oh and no, I don’t keep my journals. As soon as I finish a journal I toss it or burn it because I don’t need to revisit the moments when I wasn’t my best self, and neither does anyone else. Knowing that journal isn’t going to stick around makes it much easier for me to say whatever is on my mind.  

Make decisions in haste or act impulsively… 

This particular brain fatigue signal doesn’t show up all that often for me any more, so when it does I pay close attention! And I learned this the hard way, having agreed to a lot of things that I later regretted. 

What I do when I’ve made a hasty decision… 

The obvious thing is to avoid doing this entirely by taking a break before saying yes, but my tired brain doesn't always cooperate, and it has been known to act impulsively. So when I find myself in this predicament the best thing I have found is to gracefully apologize and bow out. 

I know we all want to be a person of our word, and we want people to know they can count on us when we say we are going to do something, but pushing through something that we regret agreeing too rarely goes well. It can lead to resentment, and a really crappy attitude, and no one wants to deal with that. Not your brain and not the people we subject our crappy attitude to. 

Plus having to go through the process of gracefully apologizing and bowing out of a commitment is going to help us stop and think more clearly before putting ourselves in that situation again in the future. 

More serious signs of a tired brain…

So far the signs I have shared up to this point are the most common for me, and probably you to at least to some degree. As I shared earlier, I have gotten really good at protecting myself, which means the next few I am sharing don’t show up all that often. I hope the same is true for you. 

But they still do appear from time to time, and it is worth acknowledging them, because when these signs of brain fatigue show up, we need to pay attention and act fast before things snowball out of control. 

Blowing things out of proportion…

When I make a mountain out of a mole hill, as my daddy would say, I know I have let myself get way too tired, and not only do I need a break but I probably should be done for the day or for the week. 

This is more than just complaining about something someone has done, this is I find myself... 

• Getting incredibly angry and spewing that anger all over anyone willing to listen in the name of ‘venting’. That is usually my hubby and while he is a really good listener, he doesn’t deserve all that.
• Offended, and by things that normally wouldn’t bother me at all. Not only do I get offended, but I let the offense grow and grow and grow until I am not even being truthful about it any more.
• Feeling the need to “share my side of the story” and look for allies to stand beside me, even if I have to exaggerate the issue to get them on my side. 

Now thankfully this version of Teresa is mostly in the past, but I do remember a time when she came out a bit more… okay a lot more and even I didn’t like being around her. 

What I do when I find myself blowing things out of proportion… 

When this happens I pull out all the tricks and throw everything I’ve got at the situation. I take a break, something that involves movement, and when the anger fades, I take a nap. I step away from the situation as much as I possibly can and if I can’t step away I journal. I will write and write and write everything that comes to my mind about the situation until I have nothing more to say. This almost always diffuses my anger. 

If it doesn’t, or if I need to clear away the stress and anger more quickly, because sometimes taking a longer break isn’t a possibility, then I use EFT, the Emotional Freedom Technique. This is actually something I was certified in as a Life Coach and it is a really powerful technique. 

You simply gently tap on specific meridian points or acupressure points on the hands, head, face, and torso while focusing on a problem. In a short amount of time, you will feel anger diminish, stress levels lower and your anxiety calm. 

What I love about this technique is that it can actually be done in the moment with others around without drawing attention to the fact you are doing it. I used to use this technique a lot when I was in the corporate world because some of the regular meetings we had could get pretty intense. 

This technique became pretty popular quite a few years ago and was more commonly referred to as The Tapping Solution. If you aren’t familiar with this technique or want a refresher here is a link to the Tapping Solution website which shares a lot of information that is pretty easy to read and understand: https://www.thetappingsolution.com/. 

Beating ourselves up… 

Another way we know we have reached a breaking point in mental fatigue is beating ourselves up with a lot of negative self talk. This could involve blowing things out of proportion as well, but it is 100% focused within. 

When our brains are simply exhausted and we have pushed through all the other warning signals, this is the one that is literally screaming at us… YOU NEED A BREAK! 

We all have doubts about our abilities and we all can be our own worst critics at times, but when we can’t seem to do anything right in our own mind, and believe the worst about ourselves, this is when we need more than a nap and journaling session to make things right. 

What I do when I find myself stuck on negative self-talk… 

For me I disconnect, and in the best possible way. I turn off my phone, get off the computer, and intentionally do things to take care of myself. This could be getting a massage, scheduling a really long nap, participating in a hobby, meditating, or just doing nothing for the sake of doing nothing. 

Usually it is a combination of a few of these things, and I give myself one full day, if not a full weekend, of self care. And it is so much more than just a bubble bath to relax. It is time to intentionally slow down and take care of me and only me. Even when I feel guilty or that I should be doing something else. I make myself a priority.  

Isolate ourselves believing no one else understands us 

The last one I want to share is the sign that I have let things go on for far too long, and that if I don’t give myself the rest I need soon, I am going to pay an even bigger price.

My happy healthy brain realizes that no one fully understands me, and is okay with that. I don’t fully understand me some days. And the “me” I am today is constantly evolving into someone new. 

But my mentally and emotionally drained brain, the one that has pushed through to the point of exhaustion and ignored all the warning signs, sees things differently. This brain sees everything through the eyes of a victim. Someone who pushes away the people who love me, and is hurt and angry that no one understands me. This version of me can only be helped by extreme self care and sometimes even professional help. This version of me will never know success, which is why I can’t let myself stay in this place. 

Whatever stage you find yourself in… 

You my friend deserve to be really well taken care of. You deserve a down time to enjoy the life you have built. You deserve loving care when things get more difficult, and you deserve extreme loving care when things have gone on far too long. 

No one can take care of you the way you can, and you owe it to yourself, to your friends and family and to the clients you are here to serve to make sure you are well cared for. Only then can you be the best version of yourself. 

And that brings us to the end of today’s episode and the end of our month of love. I would truly love to hear what has inspired you this month, so please shoot me an email at theperfectblend@caffeinecreative.io and tell me how you are taking care of you these days. 

Have a fabulous rest of your day my friends, and thank you for spending this time with me. I appreciate you all more than words can say. See you next week!